2002-11-14

Today
I feel like all the passion
Has been drained out of me
As If I've thrown it away
To be taken
By whatever phantoms have crossed my path
Over the last few years
I don't undertand this feeling
It's alien to me
Because in recent memory
I can feel myself being so full
Of complex emotions that I barely understood
That I felt like I could
Cause nuclear fallout with my breath
And now
I'm so deviod of energy
That I can barely life my head
Or keep my eyes open
There are no coals for the fire
That normally sustains me
Through even the worst moments
Of causual life
The mania I've infected so many others with
Now seems to be nothing worse
Then the common cold
Gone with a few days of tortureous treatment
I wish that I could
Give the world a better description of this
Feeling that is a lack of
Anything wonderful or even mediocrely comforting
Now I'm not saying that I've become apathetic
Or unfeeling
Because this lack is still something
That I can almost touch
A feeling of need
Or defincincy
I'm sorry
These are the best words that I have right now
And as you can see
Most of them are spelled incorrectly
And sloppily put together
And attempt to describe void with absence

~Matt Magus

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